Q&A with SuppHER
SuppHER is an inclusive supper club powered by women, which has been running popup events across Manchester since 2020. As well as raising funds for much-needed causes - all profits from the events go to various women’s charities - their events celebrate the incredible female talent in the hospitality industry.
We caught up with founders Anna Søgaard, sous chef at Erst, and sommelier and support worker Kim McBride, on feminism, #metoo, and being a woman working in the industry.
What inspired you to start SuppHER?
K: I have always been hyper aware of the gender imbalance in hospitality. Essentially, men talk louder than us, which prevents us from being heard and seen. When I became a manager, people would often assume I was a man and when I went to wine tastings, women would make up about 1% of the room. So I thought, if all of those spaces are dominated by men, I'd try to create a space for women. I started up a women's wine collective with some friends in the industry, which was so lovely but unfortunately we were all so busy that it was difficult to keep up the momentum.
Then I met Anna at Erst and we quickly realised that we were both staunch feminists. Anna instantly said ‘let's do a charity event together’. I was so in awe of her energy and confidence, of course I got on board. At the time I was volunteering for Trafford Rape Crisis so we held a supper club to raise money for them.
After the first event we heard from lots of women who wanted to be involved and that's when SuppHER truly grew into itself and became a collaborative event, not only raising money for charities but also bringing together women in the hospitality industry and showcasing their talents in a safe and inclusive space. I feel like SuppHER kind of grew into something that I have always wanted to achieve.
A: When Kim and I met while working at Erst, we would constantly talk about different women’s issues that we cared about. We had the same feminist views on things and we wanted to use our skills to make a difference for the women in our community, in a way that would bring people together and also shed light on these issues.
SuppHER event at Kampus in October 2021, raising funds for Women for Women International.
What’s been your experience working in hospitality as a woman?
K: Honestly, after about 10 years or so of working in hospitality, I was a bit defeated. I remember when I started doing my wine exams and thinking that I could try to change the industry, to make it more equal. But before I left hospitality for good I came to terms with the fact that the wine industry can bring you a lot of success, if you have a penis. Don't get me wrong, I am proud of everything I achieved in my career and there are so many incredibly successful women in wine, but I still think that we have a long way to go. I think that there are a lot more women in the Manchester hospitality scene who have each other’s backs now than there were a few years ago and that is pretty cool.
A: I’ve almost always been the only woman in the kitchens I’ve worked in. That has come with its challenges. I’ve always felt an added pressure to prove myself in a way that I don’t think my male colleagues felt.
In the early days of my career I felt pressure to fit in and it took me a long time to feel confident expressing my femininity and being myself in the kitchen. I thought I had to look and act a certain way to be taken seriously, but now I see that attitude as being part of the problem. People need to see all different types of women excelling in typically male dominated fields.
What obstacles face women in the industry?
K: These days I'm less bothered about being successful and rich and a lot more bothered about calling out abuse when I see it. And I have seen it in hospitality: creepy wine reps with wandering hands; bar owners making inappropriate comments about your body; bosses telling you to flirt for discounts; and stories of sexual abuse on nights out with work. Every woman that I know in the industry has a story like this. There is no bigger obstacle than that.
A: Women are often not offered senior chef positions - those opportunities are still so often given to men. In order for the industry to change for the better, and for it to be a place of equality, we need to see more women in senior roles.
Do you think anything’s changed for women post #metoo?
K: I would love to say that things have changed post the #metoo movement but that would be a big fat lie. The #metoo movement itself was started by Tarana Burke in 2006 but it wasn't until privileged white celebrities used it that the hashtag took off. I think that kind of sums up where we are: women of colour are more likely to experience sexual violence, but when they try to talk about it in the public domain it doesn't really get any traction.
The #metoo movement gave women all over the world the clarity to see what constitutes as sexual violence, and it may have given some women more confidence to speak out about it, but to support the most vulnerable women in our society we need policy change and action. With all of the reports in the news about police caught on camera persuading women not to press charges against their abusive partners, and rape conviction rates still going down even though there are more women reporting than ever, it feels like women's issues are just not taken seriously by our government and police. That's why it's so important to carry on spreading awareness and campaigning. End Violence Against Women are doing some amazing work, as well as Women's Aid and the Our Streets Now campaign.
A: I think women feel more confident calling out sexist behaviour in kitchens to an extent. However, sadly, you still constantly hear about women facing discrimination and even abuse in many places. It’s great to see more and more people being publicly called out for this behaviour, but it’s unfortunate to see how minimal the repercussions are for those work environments that allow this to happen.
What does feminism mean to you?
A: Feminism to me is the belief that people of all genders should be equal in every sense. Men, women and non binary people should have the same rights and opportunities and should never have to face discrimination based on their gender. We cannot continue living in a world that has been built from the male view point. It’s just not sustainable.
K: Feminism to me is about supporting our most vulnerable women, using our privilege to lift others up, speaking out about inequalities in society and pushing for change.
How do you pick your support charities?
A: We try to choose local charities that receive very little funding, so that our small contributions can make the most difference. Often the charities have also contacted us asking to get involved.
K: I also work as a support worker and I volunteered on a rape crisis helpline for a while, so some of our charities were chosen after I saw the impact that they had on people's lives.
What’s next for Suppher?
K: At the moment we are working on some really exciting projects - more supper clubs with incredible women, cooking excellent food and pouring delicious wines. We have also just launched our website with a wine shop. We offer delivery in Manchester (free over £50) and 10% of wine sales goes to our chosen charity of the month. I think we just want to grow our collective to include as many brilliant women as possible and keep supporting charities who do extraordinary work supporting women and girls.
A: We have some really exciting events coming up. We’re constantly continuing to grow our community of women who support our causes. I would love to take SuppHER outside of Manchester and perhaps collaborate with women in other cities.
